Financial Domination comes from a deep need for a loss of control. Financial Domination can be played in a myriad of ways but the main idea is a dominant woman seductively or harshly manipulating money from a submissive male.
For the submissive the idea of having a woman take money from him or manipulate him into a state of wanting to give money to her is incredibly erotic. In some cases the submissive male even dreams of complete financial ruination. This is extreme but has been done by many femme dommes in the past. Usually Financial Domination just involves the taking or giving of money either on a scheduled basis, through coercion or blackmail, or just out of an intense need to give.
Now for those of you who are reading this thinking, ‘you’d have to be nuts to get off on that,’ let me remind you that everyone has their own erotic fantasies however if you’ve ever taken a woman on a date, you’ve been financially dominated. If you’ve ever been screwed over in a divorce, you’ve been financially dominated. So don’t be too quick to judge. For some it’s painful, for others it’s very hot.
This is another fetish that has an underlying current of humiliation as well, but again it depends on the individual. To hear a woman laughing and telling you what a sucker you are can be very arousing.
Financial Domination can be done by phone, mail, live sessions or just about any way that’s imaginable. Being a Sugar Daddy is a more controlled form of Financial Domination but usually involved sex. The true fetish doesn’t involve sex at all because the dominant female wouldn’t dream of having sex with an unworthy submissive. The fact that he’s giving to her is simply because he feels that he isn’t worthy of the money but she, being more powerful and beautiful, should be made to enjoy her life with his money but without any tangible benefit to him. The mere fact that he has given the money is the benefit to him.
I use this metaphor a lot when I’m describing the feelings of the submissive in Financial Domination. When you go to a Christian church there is a time in the service where the plate is passed around and every one gives money to help keep the church running. No one there expects anything from that offering. They certainly don’t expect the pastor to get down and say blow the congregation in gratitude. (Lol that’s probably a whole other fetish.) No, in fact you give because you WANT to, you want to make sure your church is there for you next week, that the pastor can eat for the week and the bills can be paid. It’s the exact same thing with submissive men. If it’s done correctly they look at the woman as a goddess, a deity. To offer up money to their goddess is just the right thing to do. Her life is ALL that matters. As a submissive male you want to eat, sleep and breathe this woman. She IS your religion.
matt
LOSER OR WINNER?
I’m curious, how many Pro Findoms out there believe that the guy who is currently sending them money is truly an inferior loser whom they cannot respect because his nature is to give up “__” (insert anything of value, money, power, etc) for erotic gratification??? In the game or winners and losers, is the 100% vanilla guy a winner because he’s hard-wired for sexual conquest, and a submissive fetishist is the loser because he sexually enjoys his loss of worth and status? There seem to be paradoxes in the lifestyle… For example: take a guy, successful in his vanilla life, goes online (with his entertainment budget in hand) and pays a domme who treats him with zero respect and extracts disproportionate $$$ for services rendered, but at the same time makes possible a one-of-a-kind orgasm for that guy who had this fantasy to begin with. Is that guy a “loser” because he consents to a relationship where he plays the inferior, gives up worth, succumbs to his sexual fetish, or should he in truth be be regarded no differently than Mr. Vanilla because he turned his personal fantasy into reality, enjoyed his own sexual nature without concern? It seems like many dommes have boyfriends who are not submissives, probably because they’re not attracted to that type. They claim to look down on and laugh at “submissive losers” while they enjoy life with a “real man.” Do most dominant women really feel this way privately or is it because it’s required for the roleplay?
Dr Sue
Matt I’m a big proponent of not using the word loser. One, I think it’s over used and two, most Dommes don’t really think their submissives are losers. Okay let me qualify that, most good Dommes don’t think their followers are losers. Yes there are Dommes who DO think that all men in general are losers, and Dommes who play that role because that’s what the sub wants. Don’t forget about the male who enjoys the word ‘loser’. They’re out there too. But in my opinion most Dommes don’t think their subs are losers.
Goddess
I do consider these guys to be pathetic. Mostly because they have been unable to find balance in their lives, and unable to attain what they need in healthy and productive ways, ways that would require work… so they take the easy rout for instant gratification and further self destruction. It’s that mentality of being “helplessly” addicted to something that I find pathetic and sad.
I’ve had men who were ready to leave their wives and sell everything so that they could continue to serve me. I stop them. I have certain lines I will not allow my submissive to cross, no matter how lucrative it would be for me. Secretly I hope all these men overcome their addiction, but until then they are paying my way through college.
Goddess
jr
Interesting. You see them as taking the easy way out from things that would require work – your able to do this by ignoring the fact that he clearly somehow worked harder than you or your man, because of the 3, he is the only one able to afford to put you thru school? Of maybe you and your boyfriends can afford it, but choose to just use his money instead. Which is nothing wrong with it, it’s consensual…but again, the only one taking the easy way around things that require work is the sub bankrolling everyone? Interesting.
Greg
Dr. Sue,
Nervously ask….what type of alcohol should I get… Should have a cam ready for viewing.
Wonder how much time should I allow….
This is crazy…why do I crave this. Ponders when do I reach the point of no return Will I regret this in the morning.
Cannot believe I just wrote this.
Kindest regards,
Greg
Arielle
Greg,
It depends on the man. A good whiskey should do you in just right; at least that’s my weapon of choice. I’d love to witness this relinquishing of self.
Best,
Miss Arielle.
Greg
Miss Arielle,
I am such a wimp with hard liquor. Your right though. To experience such relinquishing of oneself it should start with a stiff one. I wonder how many whiskeys it would take.
I can only wonder why do I keep thinking of this over and over
Greg
Ed
Help! I’m really stingy in my vanilla life. Just losing a bit of pocket change can bug me for days! I’ve never been into financial domination before but I’ve just met a Mistress who is and I can feel the findomme bug stirring. Last night it was all I could do to not to get up and tribute her. Didn’t sleep all night. The Mistress is absolutely stunning though and i don’t even know if i want to be saved or not!
Greg
Not sure if this falls under this category. For me I have this intense fantasy of being seduced drinking alcohol and then be taken to the cleaners in the process. Cannot stop day dreaming. Find myself getting off on the idea. She slowly flirts and guides me one drink after another. I become weaker and more suggestible to the point where I lose control….
The next day I call back crying and she laughs and tells me how much I donated…Then she whispers to grab my bottle and credit card for round 2. Of course give in and the cycle repeats .
I cannot get this out my thought process. So tempting to just let go.
Wanna be
Amber
Hi Everyone!
I am a new princess. I would like some advice since a Pig has engaged in conversation with me today. Are there any tips you can give a brand new princess?
howie
i’m sad that i won’t be able to listen to Your cast on August 21, Dr Sue. Will there be a podcast that i might be able to listen to at a later time?
Dr Sue
Silly little can’t see his nose in front of him, Howie. You can listen to all the shows in the archives here on my site or on Blog Talk or on iTunes
howie
i apologize Dr Sue. i did do some poking around the site and found how and where i might be able to listen to it. Thank You.
Dr Sue
You shouldn’t need to poke Howie it’s right in the sidebar on every page… But good boy for showing initiative.
howie
i see that and i understand, Dr Sue. Thank You for letting me know.
BBW Domina Dominique
I find Financially Dominating man extremely erotic. I was a Realtime Domme for many years and now am into Distance Domination. I love forcing a man to get on his knees and worship me… theres just something about him on his knees with his wallet in his mouth that turns me on.
rdddd1111
Dear Dr. Sue,
Im not a pro dom but recently came across a guy over an internet website who wants to be my submissive. He wants to give me all his property and savings. Yes, he just wants to assign them to me and then wants me to control him by the means of controlling his finances.
My question is, could he have a hidden agenda behind this? All he wants to do is worship me and “have his life be useful for me”. He wants me to take over his bank accounts and so on.
To me personally, it sounds too good to be true that a man just wants to throw/ submit his life savings on a woman he met online just because thats how bad he wants to submissive.
Now Im confused. Also because I have never been a findom before. What gives? Have you heard of such cases?
If I were dumber, I would be rejoicing right now because I hit a jackpot. But I want to be very careful before getting myself into any legal trouble or so.
Dr Sue
Yes it happens. Does it happen a lot. NO! You’re very smart to be questioning. One, because it is rare that a guy gets to that level that quickly. My guess would be he’s probably one of those types that gets off on the idea more than actually following through. If it does turn out that he is legit then you want all your bases covered. I would never ‘take over’ a bank account. I would get one in my name and if he wants to deposit to it, so be it. You could also get in to a money laundering situation too. If this guy is out of the country, don’t even entertain it. Other than that all you can do is continue to feel the situation out and then take it from there.
Jockey
This is a o.k financial domination definition but not accurate. It is more like your own personal preference which shows a possible disgust at submissive money slaves?. Nothing wrong with that. Most women naturally prefer dominant men.
For example your contention: “The true fetish doesn’t involve sex at all because the dominant female wouldn’t dream of having sex with an unworthy submissive.” is incorrect or should be.
Some financial dominants and money slaves are so aroused by the act of financial transfers that for a fin dom it could result in an almost similar or an actual orgasmic experience. If her slave is in her presence the possible, if not likely result could be sexual activity.
As a for a fin dom, if she is a true fin dom she should have little or no interest in a alpha or dominant male just as a real money slave has no or little interest in submissive women. You simply cannot have it both ways. It is however possible your whole premise of “what is a money slave” needs a reexamination?
What about money slaves and fin doms who get married? What about money slaves and fin doms who have offspring together?
In any case thanks for your site.