You may have heard the term “quiet quitting” in the media lately. It is primarily used to describe employees who have chosen to put in the least amount of effort into their jobs. It means that basically the employee is “phoning it in.” They have lost their enthusiasm and just don’t care anymore but they don’t leave the job.
What I have noticed is that this behavior extends beyond that of the work place and is now showing up in different areas of life and for the purposes of this article I’m talking about the quiet quitting of men sexually.
More and more I hear about men who have, for one reason or another, decided to quietly disconnect from their wives and surprisingly it has connections to cuckolding.
What do I mean when I say that men are quietly quitting their sex lives within a relationship? Well what I and others have been observing are husbands/spouses who want their wives to cuckold them so much that they feel by turning off their sex lives with their wives that this will then spur them on to find another lover. I’ve even heard of men who are letting themselves go physically along with the sex shut down; men gaining copious amounts of weight and quite literally going so far as to make themselves unattractive to their chosen mate all for the sake of pushing their partner into someone else’s arms.
To say this is disgusting doesn’t even scratch the surface of description for this type of behavior. Men everywhere are addicted to porn to such a degree that they are choosing the porn over actual sex with their wives. They are choosing to create their beloved porn scenes by quietly disconnecting from their spouse and according to these men, making it all but impossible for their wives NOT to have an affair.
This type of behavior is beyond the stratosphere of selfishness and catapults it into a bizarre form of narcissism. These Jabba males feel that if they make themselves repulsive they will eventually get what they want, a wife who will cuckold him or at the very least she will leave him for another male which is also incredibly erotic to these men. Relationship be damned, love be damned these guys want what they want and they are willing to basically kill themselves to get it.
When I discuss this with real cuckolds who understand what cuckolding is truly about they get visibly irritated with these guys. Cuckold’s who know that the lifestyle is not about them but about their partner see this as the weakest form of male conduct and they don’t believe they should be calling themselves cuckolds because they don’t deserve the title.
There are wives ‘out there’ right now who are scratching their heads wondering what happened to their relationship. Why does he not want to have sex anymore? Why is he letting himself go to the point of only playing video games and stuffing his face with fast food? Why is the man I loved doing this? What did I do to create this? Because don’t forget as women, the first thing we do is blame ourselves. Where did my husband go?
He’s gone to his basement or closet or wherever he hides to watch his beloved porn and masturbate. He doesn’t want to have sex with his wife anymore because in his mind being cuckolded is more important than a healthy relationship. He rubs one out because in his mind it’s the best orgasm he’s ever had watching cuckold degradation porn. THIS IS WHAT HE WANTS DAMN IT and no one is going to stop him from either getting his wife to have an affair or leave him all together. No matter what, the pursuit of creating that porn for himself becomes tantamount to anything else in his life. The idea of being left in the dust is his entire being now.
The thing is there’s no discussion about what he’s doing with his partner. There is no communication. Perhaps he’s asked her to cuckold him and she either didn’t understand it or thought it was stupid, so there’s no point in talking about it anymore so the easiest thing to do is to completely disconnect and quietly quit the marriage. But in most cases there is no discussion at all about anything. He has never expressed his intention to his wife, he has never told her what he wants and why, he just shuts down, which then leaves his wife in the position of not understanding what the hell went wrong when what the hell went wrong was her husband became a porn addicted moron who thinks that life is only about sex and the next orgasm. Not once thinking that PORN IS ENTERTAINMENT and NOT REAL LIFE. These are also the men who because of their low self-esteem are joining the whole pussyfree thing without telling their partners as well, once again leaving their wives wondering what the fuck. They literally don’t care about their wives which is the EXACT OPPOSITE of what cuckolding is about.
So ladies, if you find yourself in this position I would suggest checking his phone and computer for his porn outlets and then confronting him with what you’ve found. If he is wanking it to interracial and/or cuckold porn the likelihood of him going down this road is very high. The problem is, if he doesn’t get REAL psychiatric help this won’t change. His addictions have become his whole life and as with any addiction, everyone and everything else in this world can piss off for the sake of his next fix. So if he refuses to get help you have to make a choice yourself. Carry on with this vile behavior and pretend everything is normal and be miserable, or leave his ass and move on with someone more deserving of your love and attention. Personally I’d choose option B because there is nothing worse than watching someone you love spiral out of control and into an early grave and anyone who would choose this over their relationship isn’t worth your time.
I will even go so far as to say that even if you did cuckold him. Even if you chose to make him happy and have sex with other men it will never be enough. He’ll want more and more because his high will need more and more stimulation to get him off. He’ll want to you have a ‘boyfriend’, he’ll want you to go away on vacay with your new boyfriend, he will start to crave sucking your new boyfriend’s cock and more. My point is nothing will satisfy someone with this type of mental illness because they will always be searching for a bigger and better high. And there is no difference between what your guy is doing and having a heroin addiction; the intoxicating substances in this case being dopamine, serotonin and orgasms.
Unless your man, and I use that term very lightly, wants to change what he’s doing NOTHING YOU DO will change him. It’s not your job, it’s his. So jumping through hoops will only frustrate you because it will never be good enough. He’s lost down the porn rabbit hole and as I said, you deserve a better life than trying to please a narcissist.
Jeff
I’m not a big lover of porn.
When I do watch it. I don’t watch BBC or Cuckold porn at all.
When I watch it’s usually Women at Gloryhole.
Be that as it may. I’m 65 my wife is 68. We both have medical issues.
We don’t have sex of any kind.
We’ve been married 10 years this year. Never have had sex. I don’t want it. She doesn’t seem to want it so why bother. We watch TV together. Mostly British Crime dramas. I have anxiety issues take medication for it. We both are diabetics. Hers is not under control.
So us not having sex is not a big deal.
wayne
I recently joined your Patreon page. I guess my marriage is doomed as I will be soon be addicted to your work and quietly quitting my sex life.
Dr Sue
Why would you quietly quit a life in which you admit you’re a cuckold Wayne? What’s there to quit?
wayne
I’m somewhat confused by your question, Dr. Sue. While I am a cuckold and my sex life is limited, there are still moments of physical intimacy. I simply meant that since i have joined your site there was the possibility I would spend more time here than engaging in in the limited sex life I am afforded. I was actually trying to make a joke. but its in quite clear comedy is just another thing I’m not good at.
Dr Sue
Ah see that feel flat Wayne. LOL! I’m like why would you be on the internet or hanging on websites if you’re living “the life.”
Jim
The bbc phenomenon seems to have its pinnacle in the cuckolding dynamic. Prominent podcasters(ie Venus and Crystal Welch) have vigorously expressed their exclusive desire for bbc. In the non-cuckolding world I am not so sure women share this fetish. I like to think that when the sex is over maybe the bbc might not be a terribly special person?
Simon B
There definitely seems to be a paradigm shift occurring in the male sexual world at the moment. With Alpha dominance over betas really coming to the fore & being increasingly actively played out.
It’s been obvious for a long time that white guys quickly become obsessed with Huge Black Dicks once they’re exposed to them. Hence, the massive popularity of BBC led porn sites like Blacked dot com & Blacks on Blondes etc, with white males.
What seems new though, and has probably been triggered by the witnessing of just how weak white guys are for BBC, is the seeming mass pivot in attitude of Hung BBC Bulls, with regard to All Male (specifically BBC on white male) sex.
Any residual reluctance or fear of gay connotations, seems to be rapidly evaporating. And being replaced by a new Alpha Domination mindset. Where breaking a white guy & utterly sexually destroying him, is now seen as a feather in the BBC Bull’s cap. Something to be proud of & openly lauded among His peers.
Indeed, I’ve heard many Bulls now comment, that they get more of a kick out of destroying white guys sexually, than they do out of having the white guy’s Wives or Girlfriends. In fact, growing numbers of Bulls now seem to get a real kick out of breaking the white boyfriend or husband, right in front of their significant other. And have them watch, as the Bull turns their once cherished partner into a life long, cum guzzling, BBC worshipping, pussyboi, right before their eyes.
Which is one heck of a huge transition, in what seems to be just the last few years or so. And, the more white guys simply cave in & the Bulls get to witness what utter beta bitches we really are. And, that we seem utterly incapable of resisting XXXL Sized Black Cock, the more BBC Bulls are naturally going to take advantage.
Pandora’s BBC box has been well & truly opened for white guys now. And, I think stories like Brian & Kevin’s etc, that seem extreme to us now, will be fairly common place within just a few years time.
100% !! Access to XXXL BBC porn & then the subsequent interaction with Super Sized BBC Bulls on social media & on their personal fan sites, has changed my life. Was this by accident or design? I think it was probably by accident to begin with back in the day, then, when the effects of BBC porn on white guys began to show themselves, there was a pivot to producing porn that worked on white guys now exposed weaknesses. Until, we’ve ended up at what appears to be the ultimate white guys kryptonite … IE: Full on, no holds barred whiteboi demolition porn.
I think your average white guy will have to start being far more aware of what’s going on & actively make a conscious decision to stay away from Big Black Cock Porn, if he ever wants to settle down & have an easy life. Unless of course, he actually wants to take that path, like many are choosing to do. Because that BBC porn rabbit hole is genuinely, more than capable of totally overwhelming, chewing up & consuming the vast majority of white guys who go anywhere near it.
However, having to admit & acknowledge that fact & then actively start taking steps to avoid BBC porn, because you’re not Man enough to stop it corrupting you. Is probably a step beyond what most white males & their egos are willing to accept at the moment. Until of course, they find themselves unable to resist taking that one way trip down the BBC rabbit hole any longer. And, finally have their eyes opened to the truth, only after it’s already too late & there’s no way back for them anymore.
And, that BBC rabbit hole is only going to be getting Bigger & Deeper & More Irresistible, even as white guys keep their heads buried in the sand & pretend they’re hooked on IR porn because of the hot ‘colour contrast’. And, that watching Rock Hard 10 Inch Black Dicks in action every night on the net, is just a bit of harmless entertainment.
Stepping back & taking an overview of the situation. White guys have definitely been tumbling lower & lower on the sexual hierarchy scale, for a while now. It’s obvious to everyone !! It’s just that white guys haven’t had the sense to recognise, admit, or do anything about it at all. Or, even look like we’re ever going to do anything about it but bitch, until we reach the very bottom of the barrel.
And, the thing is, it’s our own weakness & head in the sand attitude that’s brought us white guys to where we are now. We bought & encouraged the production of ever more Huge, Superior, Black Cock based porn. And, kept downloading & filling our lives with those BBC’s, to the point it’s literally become an obsessive, real life, worship & submission situation for us now. That, once we set the wheels in motion, white guys have rapidly lost control of. With BBC Bulls now totally dominating, driving the train & deciding its final destination.
And so, the consequences of all this & the whiteboi demolition future that’s coming, are very definitely on us white guys. We could have pulled our heads out of the sand, seen the situation coming & done something about it, but we didn’t. We sat at our computers, coughed up our porno $$$’s, downloaded tons of BBC porn, endlessly gooned & helped facilitate it all to happen. You reap what you sow, as they say … And, it certainly looks like us white guys have set ourselves up for some serious reaping in the years to come.
Dededemons
This is a great piece that hits target, cuts through the bs and I truthfully didn’t expect to find something as golden here.
What a ridiculous pile of isms from Simon whose probably so deep into his own head he didn’t recognize himself.
The simple fact is some men with unusually large genitalia congregate in the porn world and the swinger and other adjacent worlds irl and online where the size Kings and Queens lay claim to a trash empire they pretend is really owned by their subordinates.
Those men are white and black and any other race as long as the dick swings low and they want a significant part of their life dedicated to partnerless and pointless hedonist pursuits. Some will, some won’t but for poor Simon that “some will” group is outsized beyond the fraction of a percentage they are in the population.
There’s no paradigm shift except that men are doing far worse things to themselves and to their families than before pornography addiction clawed in.
Dr Sue
Just love that compliment followed by a shiv. Men…