Catfishing. It’s been in the news, and around for quite a while. But what is it exactly? Well for those of you who don’t know, catfishing is when someone pretends to be someone they aren’t usually to con them in to a relationship or out of money. And since the internet started this has become a huge ‘thing’ even having a show on MTV. Catfishing basically makes a fool out of whoever is being catfished.
However recently catfishing has slipped it’s way in to the online sex world but not in the way you might think.
In the online BDSM/PSO world there is a huge emphasis on people being real. Some will even go so far as to offer ‘verification’ services as proof that you are speaking to the actual person. In my opinion I find the practice of verification ridiculous and insulting as you read in my article Kink Scams.
The whole basis of phone sex and online BDSM is fantasy. If you want reality you go to an escort or a professional dominatrix. So when women started paying men to prove they were real I almost puked. Why? Because many women, for a variety of reasons use paid content – where they purchase photos of a particular woman and create a character based on those photos. (they also receive the model’s i.d. to prove they are over 18, if they purchased the content legally, and they should in a perfect world.)
When I first started in phone sex work 20 years ago I bought content. I didn’t want to be me because I was just getting my feet wet. I was used to doing real time sessions. The concept of BDSM by phone baffled me. So I wasn’t about to be me until I could figure out how everything worked or if I even liked doing it. For other women it’s because they want to protect their real identity which I might add, is not a BAD thing. Let’s face it, people still have issues with sex work of any kind. So protecting your identity isn’t stupid, it’s smart.
But what if the fantasy became the reality of a fantasy?
Keep saying that over and over and you’ll end up where consensual/ethical catfishing enters the online BDSM realm.
Knowing that submissive men enjoy being ‘fucked over,’ and that humiliation is a distinct thread of submissive behavior, imagine the sinfully delicious shame involved in knowing that you’re being scammed and still allow it to happen.
I interviewed one of the pioneers of this sub category of financial domination Miss Shyanne. Shyanne does Ethical/Consensual Catfishing and she’s happy to tell you why it’s the next BIG THING!
What exactly is Ethical/Consensual Catfishing?
It basically means that I am a catfish (as in, not the person who’s in the pictures that I post), but that I am telling everyone the truth about it so that it is consensual. I call what I do “Ethical Catfishing” because I don’t steal pictures or screen shots. I paid for the rights to use my content pictures, I make all of my own graphics, and all of the tribute screen shots are really mine.
Are all catfishers ethical and consensual?
Unfortunately, no. Many have simply stolen the pictures that they use from someone else. Some are not even female at all, though they may not actually say so. And many don’t even say that they’re a catfish at all. Tons of catfish dommes also steal screenshots of tributes from other dommes on Twitter who post about their brags and don’t watermark their posts.
What do you do that’s different from another phone sex operator who uses paid picture content?
Most other PSOs who use paid content pictures claim that the pictures that they use are themselves. They play a character and their content model pictures are the representation of that character. Basically the only thing that I’m doing different is I tell my potential clients up front that this is all a sham.
Do you ever have regrets about being deceitful in doing your job?
I really don’t, because I really don’t see it as being deceitful. I am completely honest in everything I do, and I am proud of that fact. I say up front that I am catering to scam fetish, ripoff fetish, etc, so anyone who pays me for my services will, I hope, be aware of that.
Do you have fun doing this type of work?
I do! It’s SUPER liberating! I get to play at fetishes that I might not normally get to enjoy. It is both more intimate and more separated from my customers. I get to be completely 100% honest with them up front, tell them that they’re serving someone who they’ll never even see, that it’s all a lie, etc. But I also get to remain completely anonymous throughout the whole thing.
Are there any dangers or pitfalls a sub might look out for if he’s interested in serving a catfish Domme?
I would say that a big danger is being scammed. I know that sounds like what it’s all about, but let me explain. Some subs, even catfish addicts, would HATE to learn that the domme that they are serving is actually male. But that’s a risk you take if your catfish domme isn’t verified somewhere and doesn’t do voice sessions.
There is also the issue of some catfish dommes stealing pictures and such. If the person who the catifsh steals from finds out, she can report the catfish account and then your domme may simply disappear overnight.
Some catfish dommes also don’t have a good grasp of fetish play at all. If you’re just looking to pay a stranger on the internet, that’s fine. But if you’re looking for more of a domme/sub experience, then that can be a problem.
I think the biggest risk, though, is age verification. Because places like AVN Stars and OnlyFans verify by ID that you are who you are posting content of, it is very easy to make sure that a domme or other adult content creator is 18 or over. However, the only way that I’ve found for catfish verification is Niteflirt, and I don’t see many catfish dommes using them unfortunately. It’s mostly done through Twitter messages with no voice interaction and payments being sent via third party platforms.
Why do you think men like this sort of manipulation?
I think it’s the next level of humiliation for them. It’s like I said before, they’re paying someone who they will never get to see and will only get to talk to if they pay.
There’s also a flair of mystery about it. Shyanne is petite, tanned, small perky breasts, and a tight round ass. But who is REALLY behind these interactions? I could be a 600 lb BBW of any ethnicity, and they’d never know LOL!
To find out more about Shyanne:
Website: FindomCatfish.com
Twitter: @FindomShyanne
Email: findomshyanne @ gmail.com
Niteflirt: Catfish Findom Shyanne
Services offered: femdom text & phone sessions, assignments, custom voice clips, honest dick appraisals, nude pictures for sale.
Payments accepted: Cashapp, Venmo, GPay, Amazon Gift Cards, Niteflirt tributes
And NO this isn’t me. LOL!
***This article and the subject matter of consensual catfishing is causing a bit of a stir with some of you feeling that it is… unethical. That by saying upfront that you’re playing your client, that it is somehow crossing a line. I find this funny as hell. So when you buy photos and create a character and DON’T TELL the client that you’re not who is in those photos, that’s okay, that’s just being a PSO (which is true)… However, if you buy your photo’s and create a character and TELL your clients that the character is not real, that’s wrong. That’s some fucked up shit. I’m all for calling out shitty behavior but that is the pot calling the kettle black. But hey, you’re entitled to your opinion which is why you can sound off below in the comments. But I’ll bet ya don’t… 😉
Where is the best place to buy photos for consensual catfishing?
Wow, thank you for your response! And thanks for being brave enough to voice your opinion. I know that I’m kind of making waves by doing this right now, so it takes guts to sound off about this.
I’d never actually thought about how people could be considered catfishing by using their own pics. That’s a really interesting point! I’d love to hear what others think of it.
I LOVE this! It’s a great humiliation tool to use on men. I don’t get why anyone would be so upset about this, especially if it’s CONSENSUAL. I guess it just goes to show the scene in flooded with jealous women, who are hypocrites. Meh.
Right! I would say that 90% of my ‘customers’ are humiliation junkies lol
I’ve seen a LOT of controversy around this lately and I gotta say, this article was super eye-opening! Thank you, Doctor Sue, for shedding some light on another misunderstood fetish, and thanks Shyanne for lending your expertise!
The thing that came to My mind is, what makes someone a catfish? Are the women who pretend to be lesbians for the camera to make money any different? Or what about those who cater to fetishes they they don’t ACTUALLY enjoy?
If it’s just a pictures thing, then what about filters and makeup? I’ve done some shocking transformations with those Myself lol! If you filter, makeup, and photoshop yourself into someone that no one would recognize as “you,” isn’t that the same thing as not being the person in the pictures you’re using? I kinda think it is. With easy access to software that makes this as simple as clicking the features you wanna change, who ISN’T a catfish?