What is a Cuckold or a Cuckold Relationship?

Cuckold Symbol

Cuckolding, when we boil it all down to its basic premise, is when the dominant half of a relationship – and because this site deals with primarily female led relationships I’ll use it in that context – decides to take on other lovers with or without the consent of the submissive partner.  The cuckold is the submissive partner.

Now let’s look at it in all its individual glory.  Those of you who know me know that I hate everything being put in nice, neat little boxes and that I hate the word normal.  Cuckolding is as individual as those couples who are participating in it.  For the most part though, the male feels inadequate, and usually is from a penis size perspective (remember I’m talking generalities here), and wants to watch his partner have sex with another man who is usually larger, more dominant/alpha and therefore more worthy of his partner than he is.

The key to making cuckolding work for you is to make it totally your own.  As a couple you need to agree on parameters that will work for both of you.  The keys to success are compromise and communication.  Here are some ideas to mull over when you’re considering making cuckolding part of your life.

  • Does the cuckold want to watch or just be told about what it was like for the woman to have sex with the other man?  Some men want to watch, some men don’t.  Some figure that the old green-eyed monster will kick in if they’re in the room during sex.  (If that’s the case I’d suggest really thinking it over BEFORE you go ahead with this.)  For the cuckold’s who don’t want to watch, being descriptively told about what it felt like, how big the other guy’s cock was, how long the sex lasted etc, works just as well.  You may even consider taking your cell phone to the encounter if it’s in a hotel and calling the cuckold at home and letting him listen.
  • For those who are watching, will you be allowed to participate in some way?  Some cuckolds are tied to a chair at the end of the bed and left there not able to masturbate during the session or they are put in chastity.  Some with bi-fantasies are made to suck the alpha male hard first preparing him for his partner.  And some cuckolds are allowed to hold his partner’s legs back facilitating entry or even to hold the alpha’s cock and guide it in to her.
  • Will the cuckold be humiliated verbally? Many submissive males enjoy being humiliated during a sex session with an alpha male.  Either by the alpha male the female or both.  Hearing your partner tell you how much better it feels being fucked by a bigger cock, listening to the alpha male say how much he loves being inside of her and that he’d never let anyone fuck someone as beautiful as this etc.

All of these are just ideas to get you started.  Remember to make it your own by coming up with your own ideas that work for the both of you.


  1. chooch says

    Wow! The author described what I want my wife to do to me perfectly!! I am married to a sexy dominant female. I have always fantasized about very powerful woman and me being sort of a wimp, we go very well together!

    For me I love it when my wife makes me jealous and fell inadequate and calls me an old man. She then starts degrading me and calling me “husband” and I love it!

    I get exited hearing about my wife and what she does with her “big” personal trainer! She tells me everything and then let’s me (you know what) while she is describing it…it turns into the best sex for both of us later.

    I want her to punish me and let me watch for real, but we are very careful, and instead she uses a realistic dildo to make me jealous with.

    If you are wondering about this, if you don’t like being dominated, if you don’t like being punished and degraded by the right person, it probably is not something you would like.

  2. Jim says

    First, let me say that my wife has been a supportive wife, mother, and grandmother. She takes care of our home, helps me around it and our yard, etc. We also get along well.
    It was apparent early in our marriage that she wanted to stray in order to find something that was missing in our relationship. It wasn’t all about sex, in my opinion, but partly because I was perhaps a bit immature in my younger years.
    As the years went on, it was obvious she had sexual relationships with several men. I was able to prove it on a couple of occasions. She could not deny those two, but I knew there had been more. A few years ago, I was surfing the web and stumbled onto a ‘cuckold’ site. I searched several and found one written from a doctor’s perspective so as to better understand what would cause a man to put up with an unfaithful wife.
    Let me back up a little here……I had years before experimented with being the ‘dom’ while having sex with my wife. However, I always felt something was ‘not right’ while seeing my wife tied up. Something was missing.
    The years went on, and wifey had a couple more encounters with other men. I decided to investigate the cuckold sites again. After much reading (mainly the psychologist sites), I came to the conclusion that it was ‘me’ that wanted to be tied up all along. ‘I’ was the submissive one, but never realized it. That was the reason why tying my wife was never fulfilling.
    I subsequently went to the dating sites where there was a ‘couples looking for a man’ section. My wife agreed to give it a try, and we had a two year relationship with a man. I usually was bound in the spare bedroom and made to clean my wife after the other man was done.
    After that relationship ended, we hooked up with another man (much nicer) who today is seeing my wife once a week. He is well hung both length and girth. My wife is very happy with the relationship, and at least I know who she is with. The only thing is that I am not involved from a submissive side. I enjoy the bondage part, but as long as she is happy, I am fine.

  3. Lisa C.M. says

    I almost wish the word “cuckold” did not exist. It causes everyone to think that there is a strict definition of a male whose woman is dating other males. After several years of marriage, my husband and I separated. Over the next year and a half I started dating again, and enjoying it. I was over 30 and enjoyed men and sex. What’s wrong with that? Then, my husband lost his job and begged me to let him move back. I did, just to put a roof over his head. And, I needed someone around the house to take care of things while I ran my business full-time. However, I didn’t stop dating, and I let him know about it up front. He was just happy to have a job and a place to sleep at night, so my dating was the least of his worries. Now, over three years later, I’m still enjoying being able to have my cake and eat it, too. Does that make my husband a “cuckold”? Well, I suppose, but I don’t that want that “label” to ruin my arrangement with him. I don’t want his embarrassment over having a label attached to him, challenge his male ego (they all have them, you know) to the point that he feels he has to pack up and leave.

    • Dr Sue says

      Extremely good point Miss Lisa. Labels when it comes to sex are ridiculous, sex in all it’s forms and glories is all a very grey area anyway. The labels really need to go, unfortunately we as mere mortals all want to belong to something so I don’t see it happening too soon. I personally find the word cuckold distasteful myself. And every couple who indulge literally do it distinctly different from each other so there is no one label that works anyway.


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