Financial Domination comes from a deep need for a loss of control. Financial Domination can be played in a myriad of ways but the main idea is a dominant woman seductively or harshly manipulating money from a submissive male.
For the submissive the idea of having a woman take money from him or manipulate him into a state of wanting to give money to her is incredibly erotic. In some cases the submissive male even dreams of complete financial ruination. This is extreme but has been done by many femme dommes in the past. Usually Financial Domination just involves the taking or giving of money either on a scheduled basis, through coercion or blackmail, or just out of an intense need to give.
Now for those of you who are reading this thinking, ‘you’d have to be nuts to get off on that,’ let me remind you that everyone has their own erotic fantasies however if you’ve ever taken a woman on a date, you’ve been financially dominated. If you’ve ever been screwed over in a divorce, you’ve been financially dominated. So don’t be too quick to judge. For some it’s painful, for others it’s very hot.
This is another fetish that has an underlying current of humiliation as well, but again it depends on the individual. To hear a woman laughing and telling you what a sucker you are can be very arousing.
Financial Domination can be done by phone, mail, live sessions or just about any way that’s imaginable. Being a Sugar Daddy is a more controlled form of Financial Domination but usually involved sex. The true fetish doesn’t involve sex at all because the dominant female wouldn’t dream of having sex with an unworthy submissive. The fact that he’s giving to her is simply because he feels that he isn’t worthy of the money but she, being more powerful and beautiful, should be made to enjoy her life with his money but without any tangible benefit to him. The mere fact that he has given the money is the benefit to him.
I use this metaphor a lot when I’m describing the feelings of the submissive in Financial Domination. When you go to a Christian church there is a time in the service where the plate is passed around and every one gives money to help keep the church running. No one there expects anything from that offering. They certainly don’t expect the pastor to get down and say blow the congregation in gratitude. (Lol that’s probably a whole other fetish.) No, in fact you give because you WANT to, you want to make sure your church is there for you next week, that the pastor can eat for the week and the bills can be paid. It’s the exact same thing with submissive men. If it’s done correctly they look at the woman as a goddess, a deity. To offer up money to their goddess is just the right thing to do. Her life is ALL that matters. As a submissive male you want to eat, sleep and breathe this woman. She IS your religion.
very interesting exchange of perspectives.
one thing that I have lived is the emotional toll the fetish takes. i’m sure it sounds academic given the exchange of power and the sums involved, but i’ve felt it more deeply than most other things in life.
The need to please and the need to ensure financial survival are opposites, and can really cause some obsession/stability issues. And they don’t end together. If you feel the need to serve one night, you do so and you drain, but the draining affects days and weeks afterwards sometimes, whereas the need to serve might become diluted by other life issues.
I’ve been trying to get into financial domination, but I’m not sure exactly what to SAY to men. I can be mean if that’s what they want. I know a lot of mistresses sell mp3’s, but I’m not sure what’s on them. Do you just give them things to do, call them names, and tell them you own them? Just…more explicitly?
I’ve been looking for sites that teach it, but only this has been the most helpful.
If you want to financially dominate a man you need to get his attention and keep it. You get his attention by stimulating his cock with the sound of your voice as well as what you say and by your actions. Send him a free pic while you talk on the phone. Encourage him to stroke and ask him what turns him on about the picture you just sent him. He may not know it, but he’ll be surprised and want to open it. Keep him stroking and listen to his voice. Is he getting genuinely turned on. If so, feed his lust with more (you might have to experience trial and error), but send him a PPV email at a nominal price ($1). Write in the hidden part of the email to look at the picture and stroke much harder and faster than before. When the payment comes thru, tell him he’s turning you on and you’re preparing another one. Send each at a nominally progressive higher rate. As he clicks to pay and follows your instruction to stroke harder and faster, you’re conditioning him to respond to you because you give him pleasure if he does so. This is how you will convince him you’re the answer to all his dreams. Over time, watch free porn with him. Sell him your Yahoo ID and exchange porn URLs through it with him. Ask him to call out your name as he strokes. When he balks at a price increase, tell him it’s okay to have limits and send him a freebie or lower priced one to show no bad feelings. Don’t apologize, it shows weakness. But don’t be a fucking bitch either. Milk him and praise him when he comes. Keep doing this until he’s conditioned. If he’s married or has a girl friend and he’s calling you more and more, tell him it turns you on to feel his lust for you. Ask him to stop having sex with them and come to you more and more. Once you feel he’s hooked on you, don’t send the PPVs and see if he notices. Then engage discussion about it and see if he’s willing to pay you to send him PPVs. You can contact me thru my email address if you want to learn more. I am a financial submissive with a lot of experience and I get off on teaching women how to fuck me over.
Lovely advice with one exception. A professed Domme should never be selling you PPV’s of her naked self. Most men aren’t worthy of the pictures for one, but the most important thing is, by selling PPV’s of yourself or doing naked cam shows, you’re not Dominating him. You’ve just lowered yourself to becoming like every other female porn star out there. No real woman saying she’s a Dominatrix sells naked pics or does naked cam. It’s demeaning and levels the playing field.
Oh, Dr. Sue, you are SO correct. My Goddess has spent years determining what excites me the most about being Her slave (financial and otherwise). And then She exploits it at just the right times.
Honestly, Her physical attributes have nothing to do with it — She knows that 99% of sex is mental. And She’s convinced me to tell Her more than I EVER should have told Her about me and my desire to live in a totally Female Supremist world. She has taken a lot of time to learn what sexually excites me the most about Financial Domination and other forms of Femdom. And She has used it many, many times against me, to the delight of both of us!
Bob offered some great ideas, and others here have done the same. But if I were to give advice to Ms. Mittens, it would be to take the time to cultivate a slave — determine the types of Femdom/Financial Domination that will please both of you — and then pull his strings.
Never forget that a slave is searching and yearning for something he can’t get at home. I have a big family which I happily love and serve – and yet, I believe it’s only right to give more to my Goddess each year. She has become the sexual focus of my life.
Hi Dr. Sue thanks for the response. Yes I know what you mean that i need to find my rock bottom to quit but thats what i thought happened in 2006. i went bankrupt becuase of money slavery, i could make my minimum payments on my credit cards or loans and had to sell my car to get the balances down as part of the bankruptcy agreement. I tried to quit after this and was doing good for a month until i broke down by this one domme who was sending me emails and constantly trying to get me back into it even though she knew i went bankrupt?? anyways over the enxt year i sold everyhting had a second job and spent it all on what i thought was 6 dommes, but the other 5 turned out to be the first domme i mentioned and found out i was her main event on her website for a year.
I finally left that situation and decided therapy was the way to go and found a phone therapist on niteflirt that claimed she knew how to cure money slaves through her method. it was a two year program with all these tests etc and now its been 2 years and she says she is moving on from therapy for a little while and she recommended a money domme to me that she knew and said the domme would contact me and that i need to transition back?? No clue what that meant or why she was leaving therapy. Maybe niteflirt rules or soemthing agasint therapy??
Anyways your right i masturbate 3-4 times daily and everyday i spend, use to be just once a day spending and the spending was with the therapist very controlled as i was getting better i think the other times just fantasizing while i masturbated but now im spending twice a day and masturbating over 4 times a day now with this new money domme.
Anyways just wanted to give some clarity to my past since 2006.
Whoa! Okay first of all most therapists on Niteflirt are bogus. She ran you through a battery of tests to keep you calling back. It shouldn’t take 2 years to help someone with an addiction problem. When I say you need a therapist, I’m talking find an actual psychiatrist or psychologist that specializes in sexual addiction that you are physically going to see. For a therapist to say you need to see a Domme because she’s getting out of the ‘therapy’ business is proof she wasn’t a therapist at all. No therapist in their right mind would tell you to go back to your behavior. She should have recommended another therapist.
I’m sorry you’ve had such a bad time with your Financial Domination experience. And that you had a ruthless domina. That is the nature of the beast though. I still think you should dump the whole thing and seek out a QUALIFIED therapist in your area.
hi there, i had a previous post and my name was Joe, but seems there another joe so im tobby for now on my post was long and on july 25. Money slavery is no joke, literally i feel ive been turned into a literal human atm for life. i feel ive been literally changed and that quitting this is impossible.10 years ago i thought my life would be different today but now it consists of masturbation 3-4 times a day seeking out whos online to pay stuff like this. Runing home from work with boner in pants,,middle of the night jumping up to the computer.im alsways almost broke or on my way to be broke, debt out of control,,i dunno whats going to happen and if ill ever get my life back.
Hi Joe/Tobby (which I think you meant Toby) anyway, as with everything in life it can spiral out of control and end up an addiction. It sounds as though this is where you are now. But, as with any addiction you have to reach that point where you just don’t like yourself anymore. You need to reach your rock bottom.
With the little you’ve said here I’d say you’re nearing that point if not already there. Financial domination is fun but, as with anything it can get out of control. I get men to gauge it this way; if you’re playing to the point where you’re in debt and are finding it difficult to pay your actual living expenses such as rent, heat etc., if you are finding your behavior to be compulsive such as with masturbation several times a day, or if you simply cannot go a day without logging in and losing money, you definitely have an addiction and obviously that’s not cool. You have to ask yourself if you’re ready to quit what you’re doing.
Being financially dominated is fun, erotic and definitely a turn-on and it’s great if you have the money to play, but if you don’t have the means to play then it’s time to pull the plug or better yet, don’t do it in the first place. The way you really know if what you’re doing isn’t working is this; if what you’re doing makes you feel in any way negative (guilt, fault, shame), at any time in your life (so obviously you’re going to feel good while you’re doing it but if you have the guilt or whatever afterward or when you have to explain that you can’t make rent) then for the love of god don’t do it because it will always have a negative effect on your life. And that my friends is true of every aspect of your life, not just sexually.
Joe/Tobby if I were you I’d start thinking about addiction therapy.
how can I get more money pigs? what are good techniques? Do they pick the goddess on how beautiful they are or how mean they can be?
Well Princess it sounds like you’re not unlike a lot of women out there who think this a fast way to make big bucks. WRONG! You need to learn the art of wallet raping before you can just dive in. Each person is different in the subtle nuances they enjoy. Surf the web and do some learning before you profess to be a Princess.
What a terrific thread. The insight from everyone here is tremendous!
I have a large family, so I certainly have work/life/slave balance. And yet, part of me is fully convinced that I was put on this Earth ONLY to pay and serve my Goddess. She certainly knows how to squeeze it out of me – and honestly, it has become the most sexually-exciting part of my life.
Sometimes, She takes Her money from me. Other times, I give it without prompting – simply because I sometimes cannot control the urge to hold back.
Ms. Lauren Rules, I love the way You describe this. But fortunately, my Goddess has perfected the art of squeezing me slowly – claiming some of this cow’s milk as he makes it. That way, She gets a lot more money out of me in the long run.
And after seven years, my love for helping provide Her lavish, well-deserved lifestyle keeps growing & growing every day.
As someone who is studying business and economics, we are constantly being taught about how the most successful businesses survive and it is having a lot of customers who keep coming back, whether it be daily, weekly or monthly.
I have looked and I have made more money in a year, off the men who call me for a few minutes and send me small tributes daily or weekly, than I have from men who I milk $1000.00 out of in one session. (Often they never come back, they do one session with a girl, and move on)
If you base everything a few whales, when you lose even one of them, it can hurt your lifestyle, take the fantasy guys, with the fetish guys and the real subs/slaves. In the end, it is all about how much you made at the end of the year.
B”H
Princess Sarah. i am happy to give and I have a Mistress and she is my exclusive Dome.
I love to give and set a base tribute of 120. I will probably just give and say well I’ll have less food or whatever and put 8 or ten more dollars instead of some little thing. on my debit. Remember the smart vampire can live forever if there is always blood. But too much at once and they both die.
The smart vampire makes friends with living humans who are willing to donate blood. It is private and she is not hunted down. She lives forever and he helps a beautiful girl live. it feels good.
For me it is a Fetish, I LOVE taking money from men who are willing to give. For me the thrill is them giving it freely. I often have men ask me to log into their accounts and various other actions where I would be taking there money from them.
To me there is no fun in that, I enjoy the thrill and little bit of surprise when I see that they have paid. I know they will, but I still love seeing they have GIVEN me my money.
I equate it to going to the Casino, do not spend money you cannot afford to lose, I do not worry about their bills, that is not my problem, if they want to play with me they know the deal ahead of time and I feel no pity. Like I said, I will not take, they must give freely. Free Will.
ok i feel this way too .. it’s more of a turn on for me to receive then take.. he has to willingly give it to me.. but when he says something like… “I can’t give you things like i have today” i get a lil upset and demand a lil more from him and he willingly gives.. I have not met my slave and only seen one picture of him.. he don’t care about that stuff.. all he wants is to buy me things to make my man happy.. like he’s not good enough for me… that only his gifts are good enough…
This all fell in my lap one day and i’m REALLY REALLY new to it.. hoping i learn fast how to treat him before he moves on.. this thread is helping me learn alot.. thank you all!!!
side note, anyone want to teach me???
Financial Domination becomes a fetish for the FinDomme as well. There is nothing hotter than knowing that you’ve just manipulated a man to pay you hundreds of thousands of dollars and that you’re addicting him even more. And as you’re struggling with your bills because you gave me hundreds, I’m relaxing and living the good life. It’s a true power exchange. You can spank someone as a power exchange and the next day, maybe their ass is a little sore, maybe not. The pain from financial abuse can hurt for years 🙂 This is a fetish for sadists indeed!
Very deliciously said Lauren…
I totally agree! I have been enjoying my summer thanks to my newest sub sending me regular green dot tributes! I have enjoyed a water park day, spa trips, getting amazon surprises in the mail, all thanks to him. I get a thrill when I am out spending (what was) his money even if I am just buying mundane things like windshield wipers.
The fact that he has sent me over $2000 in the last month……………… without ever having met me (yet) only adds to my delight.
Makes me wonder how far his submission will go once we have met.
Absolutely! I get such a rush every time I buy something with a slave’s money or open a package he sent Me. It’s the best feeling to know, 100%, without a doubt that I am in control. With other fetishes, 9 guys out of 10 are trying to top from the bottom to get you to get them off. Financial Domination is pure, simple submission.
A Domme is responsible for her submissive’s well being. Financial domination is not different from any other kind – remember, “safe, sane and consensual”.
If you’re being financially dominated, your Domme *should* pay attention to your social and financial limits, and ensure you don’t come to real and lasting harm… Yes, even if your fantasy is to be completely ruined. Just like in physical domination, there are ways to make you feel fully the terror, helplessness and humiliation without causing major damage. That’s the difference between a “user” and a responsible owner, between domination and abuse.
Your job as a submissive is to communicate with your Domme, including the concerns and problems you might be having, and in a way that’s not demanding or passive-aggressive, but *does* state your honest needs. There should always be a safeword, even if she never lays a hand on you… And, your job as a human being is to get the hell out if your basic needs and hard limits are not respected.
After all, exceptional subs are few and far between. We *do* appreciate your services, and want you to last us a long time! 🙂
Fabulous! That said I wish more domina’s would heed your advice, unfortunately many do not as I put in this post https://thedrsuereview.com/cuckolding-for-ladies-youre-getting-carried-away-girls/. This is something I try to remind submissives of all the time. Thank you for being sensible.
Communication goes both ways though, not sure if this will be a double post as my computer wiped my previously typed comment.
Anyways back on topic though, I find that alot of Fin subs begin to get in a habit of lying. Being as we do not always know intimately our pets situation and there is the chance they are lying about what we do know… it is often hard to gauge how far you CAN literally take a pet. I had a pet throw 2k at me in one weekend and the next I pushed him to 3-4k. I asked about his job and everything seemed legit but then one day he said he could do no more. This is often a part of the game as we all know, and when pushed sure enough another 2k came out of him…
A month later I was emailed scanned copies of his collection notices and possible bankruptcy he was going to file. Am I at fault? I asked the questions and he lied about the answers…
I say this not to cover up for those who clearly just go way to far on purpose but as a sober warning to the subs who get into this addiction to ALWAYS use honesty as the best policy.
I love a huge take as much as the next Domme but long term pets satisfy me more.
Of course you’re not at fault. He knew the rules and played the game. No one put a gun to his head and made him call and tribute and unless the sub has a fetish for ruination no Domme should take someone to that point knowingly. And I have to say that there are very few men who want to build back from bankruptcy. More experienced Domme’s such as yourself know that the long haul is better. If a Domina is trying to take everything at once it shows her inexperience.
But MOST Dommes do take us men to the point of total ruin.in most all cases they could care less…this is happening to me now.i am told oh well there will be another to take your place!
I have two points to this.
1. I am not holding a gun to anyone’s head “forcing” them to give me cash. I’m not co-ercing them in anyway. (Seducing and manipulation perhaps, but not coercion.) Where is the personal responsibility here? I have been a BDSM practitioner for a very long time and it amazes me how often a submissive who doesn’t want to take responsibility for their action “blames” their dominant. Money masochists…you “do* have a safeword, its called NOT SPENDING
Is it the car companies fault when you overspend on your car? Is it the credit card companies fault for giving you credit? It’s not your FinDommes fault for overspending on Her either.
2. Point two is there can be a different case. There is a sub category of extreme Financial Domination of guys who have a desire to be pushed into bankruptcy. If he is going in with both eyes open and desires this, who am I to say no?
Many forms of BDSM have extreme practitioners, and those who yell how unsafe, or abusive it is. Cane someone to bleeding? Many would scream abuse. Castration? Many would flip out at this thought. 24/7 Total Power Exchange slavery? There is a camp that feels this is never healthy. Why shouldn’t there be a form of Extreme Financial Domination as well?
OMG Lauren I love you! This is so true and no one puts it straight like you do. You’re right…no is holding a gun to anyone’s head and when I get a gentleman who calls me and tells me about the wretched domina who took all his money I always explain to them, “they’re doing their job.” You call or contact a financial dominatrix and you just can’t understand what happened to your money? At what point do we take responsibility for our actions? YES it can become addictive just like anything else in life. If you have an addictive personality, don’t play money games and don’t do crack and meth, it’s all the same thing.
I Disagree.I am in my late 30’s & i started calling 800#’s out of curiousity like 12yrs ago. i remember it was in no time i was broke.Anyways, i am now talking to a 22yr old on niteflirt for the past 3 months.She has taken nearly $2000.I cant explain this.i mean right before i found her on there i was actually getting this undr control,…but her laugh,giggle i just am to the point where i cannot stop calling her!! this is going to ruin me financially,..as she is now taking my savings $$$$.Honestly, i believe women love doing this to all of us men.There are sooo many women doing this!! they are destroying are lives & keeping us in poverty forever!! I truly think this should be illegal
I am currently owned by Goddess Tierra, and have been for almost 3 years now. I’ve sent my Goddess over $33k since I started serving Her, and also, like the above poster, work on my Goddess’ clipstore and help Her promote Her website too. It feels great being owned, but sometimes I do have moments where I wonder what I’m doing with my life. I give Her every spare penny I have, and any spare time I have I am working for Her on Her clipstores and website or talking on Yahoo. I have no life apart from sitting on my PC and I am getting very isolated from my family. It’s as if Goddess is my ownly focus in life. It’s like what you say – “Her life is ALL that matters. As a submissive male you want to eat, sleep and breathe this woman. She IS your religion.” – very true indeed!
Richard try to remember that having this fetish is great but not to the exclusion of all else. Yes she should be all you think about but to be fair you do have a life of your own. If you find that you can’t balance your two lives then you have something to think about. Perhaps you’ve tipped over to addiction and that’s not good for anyone…except your Goddess but even though you’re a submissive, doesn’t mean you aren’t a human being with interests and a life other than you fetish.