I had a great question from K come in and I could have sworn I did an article on this but when I looked I realized I had only touched on it lightly in another piece so here’s the scoop on just WHY it’s difficult to maintain your subbie feelings when you cum.
Many men request CEI (cum eating instruction) from me and quite rudely I might add because it’s usually phrased in the form of a challenge. “Can YOU make me eat my own cum?” I DOUBLE DOG DARE YA! Like it’s some sort of magical skill that some women have and some don’t. The truth is, it’s all on you boys. It has nothing to do with us chicks and our mad skills at being forceful.
[Drum roll] The real reason you guys lose your submissive feelings after an orgasm is because of a HORMONE!! And that annoying little hormone is known as Prolactin. Yes the same hormone that produces breast milk in women causes you to lose your submissiveness for approximately forty five minutes after an orgasm.
Prolactin is a feel good hormone when it comes to sex. It’s the afterglow feeling you get after you just finished fucking. For women it makes us cuddly and content but for some of you boys, you go through what I call the ‘false self.’ In those moments after an orgasm you will feel as though you have total mental clarity. The problem is that’s the false self. (Side note here: this is also part of the reason why you guys hang up after you spew your goo while on a call without saying thank you or goodbye. The other part is because you’re just being a selfish, rude, asshole and are ashamed at your own behavior.)
What happens is, you have an orgasm and your body gets a shot of prolactin. This is when men start the ‘regret cycle,’ which is why I call this the regret hormone for men. This is when you start with the mind chatter ESPECIALLY if you just indulged in some form of fetish play that you have feelings of shame around. So for example, a male sub just finishes sucking some guy’s dick, now our dick sucker is in no way gay, just submissive which can screw with the mind of most hetero guys on a good day. So they’re really submissive and they follow through with what they’ve been dreaming of doing, they do it, they have an orgasm and then BOOM, the regret starts flooding your system. “What the fuck did I just do?” “What sort of a man does this shit?” followed in the end by…. “I’M NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN!” Sissies go through this one as part of purging. I believe it also contributes to the guy you meet at a bar, you sleep with him and then he just wants to bolt or as the saying goes, “chew his own arm off,” to get out of there.
In these moments immediately following your orgasm the prolactin pushes the submissive feelings away and you begin the negative chastising narrative in your mind. In those moments you believe you’re thinking very clearly but you’re not, you’re under the influence of a hormone but because we don’t get memos from our bodies saying, “HORMONE ENGAGED PLEASE WAIT,” we think it’s the true self instead of the false self.
But just how do we know it’s the false self and not you having some moment of super, alpha male clarity? Because once your body relaxes for about 45 mins to an hour you’ll find your submissive feelings are right back where they were all safe and sound. And those feelings remain. That’s because THAT is your true self not under the influence of a hormone.
Now you can see the real reason behind chastity. It’s not just to torture you, although that IS fun, it’s about controlling the orgasm. Control the orgasm, control the male. Orgasms screw with the submissive mind big time because of this hormone (and others, but prolactin is the main culprit).
This brings us back to our cum eating challenge. For those of you boys who feel that it’s ALL OUR FAULT because you can’t eat your cum after you orgasm, now you can see it’s not. I tell anyone who asks for CEI the same thing, unless I’m standing right next to you when you cum and PHYSICALLY make you eat it, the chances of someone over the phone making you eat your own cum is very minimal unless you listen to instructions at the time of your orgasm which is basically, HURRY UP AND EAT IT! You have to eat it within those first few seconds after the orgasm or you’ll never do it. And in most cases, when you’re talking on the phone, you’ve hung up because you waited too long and then blame the woman saying she sucks at domination. Quelle surprise! Get in line, we’re used to being blamed for everything but the truth is, if you just start doing it a little at a time right after each orgasm, you’ll be a cum eater in no time.
So in K’s case he was worried he wouldn’t make an effective cuckold if he lost his submissive feelings after an orgasm. Well that’s an easy one K, just don’t cum. Your orgasm should be the LAST thing that ever happens if that happens at all. Remember our motto:
CONTROL THE ORGASM, CONTROL THE MALE
So if you want to eat your own cum, and you’re alone or on a call with a Domme, do it in the micro seconds after you squirt your genetic garbage in to your hand or plate or whatever you’re using and you’re golden. Wait, and you’ll be thinking you’ve lost your mind for ever thinking about eating your own cum in the first place, well… until you finish your after sex sammich then you’re back to your true subbie self, wishing they mayo on your sammy was self-made.
In the end though, you don’t get a pass for shitty behavior based on your hormone levels. If we, as females, have to hold our shit together with the myriad of hormones we experience on an average day, you do too. Therefore, you don’t get a free pass for being a jerk after you cum because for those of us in the know, we’re just sitting her waiting with the chastity device and lock ready to CLICK you back to reality.
What do you think? Leave a reply below!