Pat probably thinks I forgot about him but I didn’t. He wrote me last month, yeah I know I’m a procrastinator with way too many balls in the air, but he always makes such valid points that I know others will benefit from and he’s done it again!
Here’s what Pat wrote:
“Does submitting to someone of the same sex, while otherwise being attracted only to the opposite sex, make someone bisexual?
Over the last few years I’ve realized that I am sexually submissive with women, and possibly, maybe with the right kind of man as well. But I otherwise have no interest in men. I have no desire for a vanilla sexual interaction with a man. It’s just about dominance and submission.
Have you ever encountered submissives like this and what do you think it means?”
I talk to many, MANY people who are sitting in this position. You guys always hear me talk about the sliding scale of sexuality. If we peeled away all the layers we are all inherently bi-sexual on some level. It’s just that some of us lean more one way or the other. Take myself for example; I have no lesbian tendencies at all. I’ve watched girl-on-girl porn, I’ve actually even participated in threesomes with 2 girls and one VERY LUCKY guy, yet I had no inclination to go near the other women, the urge or eroticism just isn’t there. But I DO know that given the right circumstances and the right mood or ambiance that I might go down that road. Who knows? I’m not about to pigeon hole myself and say, NO WAY I’M NEVER TACO MUNCHING!
I counsel primarily men and there are so many of you guys who are sitting in this position which I would say is right, dead smack in the middle of the sliding scale and sometimes that’s a harder position to be in.
I will say this again and again until I’m blue in the face; Pat’s position is all based on D & s. When you’re feeling sexually submissive, it’s more your need and desire to serve that makes you suck another man’s cock. It has NOTHING to do with your sexual orientation. Guys always figure if I suck a cock I’m a fag. Wrong! Unless you have romantic desires (i.e. Find other men sexually attractive and would go in to a romantic relationship with them) for the opposite sex you are NOT gay! Are you bi? Yup! But remember even bi-sexuality has a sliding scale. It’s our society’s need to label everything that fucks up your heads.
A submissive male who sucks another guys cock is not gay he’s SERVING! He’s PLEASING! It’s coming from that submissive part of you not the sexual orientation part of you. I see more people in pain from having confusing thoughts that don’t conform to what society deems as ‘normal’ that it saddens me. If we weren’t so god damn focused on what our neighbor is doing or who they’re fucking people wouldn’t have to feel this emotional confusion and pain. What you do behind closed doors (consensually) is none of anyone’s business. Would I like for everyone to be able to discuss what they do openly without judgment? Hell ya! Is that going to happen in our lifetimes? Sadly, no.
Even when you are in that submissive situation and you are sucking his cock or doing anything else sexually to this, I’m assuming, alpha male and he’s telling you you’re a ‘dirty faggot,’ even THAT doesn’t mean anything. It’s part of the humiliation streak that goes along with your submissiveness.
I have men who phone me in complete FEAR who say to me, “what if I suck a cock and like it?” So? Let’s look at that, you suck a cock and you like it, chances are you’re not enjoying the oral based on, “oh I want this guy to like me,” it’s because you are SERVING. You are delighting the idea of pleasing this guy and a lot of times it’s at the behest of a Dominant female who’s telling you to do it. In that case you’re doing what you’re told, you’re a good sub in that moment. Just relax and enjoy that wonderful feeling of submission instead of letting your mind squirrels tell you you’re wrong, or fucked in the head. You’re not!!!!
The real key in enjoying what you do is letting go of trying to ‘fit in’ with the rest of the world. Why on earth do you want to fit in with a bunch of fickle, mind-changing, bigoted, paranoid people? It’s a game you CANNOT win. So to try to play it is more ridiculous than you sucking a cock. Do what you love, what makes you feel good and let go of the societal/religious programming.
Sucking a cock in a D & s situation DOES NOT MAKE YOU GAY!
I love sucking huge black cock. I go into a cocksucking frenzy when they take it out. I can’t get enough of that delicious black nutt. And I get so hard when they call me a gay cocksucking faggot durring the act. Does that make me gay? There’s no attraction until that juicy cock gets released then get back.
Thanks for the response on this Dr Sue. I feel exactly how you explain the submission part and servicing a horny guy in need. Never have been attracted too, done any other bi, just blow jobs for them. IT is hot for me to be in that situation and I am sure they seem to enjoy the no strings blow jobs. Thanks for the re in-forcement, of what I came to realize for myself. I am ok with my sexuality. I love women, and love to be of service for women in any way, or guy that just wants a good blow job.
I am a basically heterosexual man, married and divorced. I have a Mistress who introduced me first to anal sex with her then to her taking my arse with dildos. I was terrified the first time she had a man join us and made me suck his cock — as with Pat, I did not want her to think I was gay. She told me what you said, that I was doing it to please her, that thinking about then watching me suck a cock and take his cum made her incredibly hot and wet. She has since offered me to three of her friends and I found that being freed of the misplaced fear of being thought gay freed me to enjoy sucking cock. It has also enhanced our sex.
Very nice comment site l’ve enjoyed reading all the different letters, I started out cross dressing at age 13, my mother talked to me about it she was very understanding and l stopped on my own. Later I started working in heavy industry and didn’t dress anymore for many years, around age thirty l got the urge to dress again and also I got a craving to suck cock older men only on my knees I was able to connect with several guys, and I loved it as did they I got complimented on my cocksucking skills many times , this went on and off for many years I’ve had several threesomes with women involved also very enjoyable and they loved it , I don’t really wonder any more about sexual orientation l’m probably a gay crossdresser l love sucking cock and being submissive and there are very many guys that love getting a free blow job most of they don’t want any more than the sex l’m fine either way l like kissing and cuddling also
My doctor advised me to not give blow jobs if I had any sores in my mouth, and to take the man as deep in my throat as possible when they cum to lessen chances of disease. He said there is actually very little risk.
I sucked and was fucked by three men for their Christmas presents. I don’t think anything about being a cum dump for my friends.
I was fucked properly for the first time a few months back. Ever since i was young different guys have tried to fuck me, but no one ever taught me how to relax. I have always had the desire to see what it felt like. I meet a guy on line who was visiting my town. I meet up with him in his camper. we got naked and i started to suck him, he then sucked me before i went back to sucking him. I was by now very aroused. I moved up to suck his nipples, but as i moved up our eyes locked and I was for the first time fulfilled with the desire to kiss a guy. As we moved towards each other i had no hesitation in kissing him. As we were kissing he moved his cock towards my arse. As he held it there i pushed back. He took that to mean i was ready for him. He got up, lubed himself and me. After several attempts and re-lubing he finally entered me, he then slowly fucked me. I was in heaven and he knew it. Made the comment that he knew i loved his cock in me. After a while he rolled me over and had me lay face down, then he set about really fucking me, then asked where i wanted him to cum, and I said in me, which he did. When he pulled out and set about cleaning himself up I masturbated myself. When i left i was horny for days, constant erections and leaked so much precum. had to masturbate a few times a day to relive the pressure. I have never been so horny after sex ever.
I sucked my first cock when i was about 13. A school friend and I would masturbate often together, one day he asked my to suck him, so i did. After that time all he ever wanted was a blow job. I did it with a couple of other mates as well. Gave up for many years once I left school, then one day meet a guy who took me to a park, we ended up sucking each other. I felt guilty after, but a few days later I was over the guilt and have not stopped sucking cock since. Sometimes it can be a long period between, other times only days or weeks. I’ve even been known to suck total strangers off. Wish i had one to suck now
I sucked my first cock at 14 and liked it, but neither of us cummed, I sucked me next and last cock at 29. Married my wife at 30 and have wanted to suck some more clean-cut young cocks ever since. I told several of the he guys I used to hang around with, but NO takers of my services. I can’t tell how many times I have humped my pillow fantasising sucking cock. Now all I think of is sucking that cat cock feeling it getting harder and harder,felling it pulsating and feeling that load of cum ejecting into mmy mouth. And I would love for him to call me a FAGGOT, andQueer “You fucking cocksucking faggot,, swallow my fucking cum”.
I started sucking cock in the service and i fucking love it.Ive been with several different guys in the last month and love seeing those hanging balls while im pounding that ass,its a complete turn on.
I have a girlfriend and she has no clue i do this.I would really love to have my ass pounded out in every position…..i dream about it !