Of course it can if you’re not open.
Here’s the best foundation to make cuckolding work in your relationship:
It’s essential that each partner be honest and upfront about their feelings. There is no right or wrong way to cuckold. The trick is to make it work for the two of you. There are so many different ways to cuckold that the possibilities are endless but at no time should one person jump ahead and do something without consulting the other, unless you agree on that ahead of time.
I always suggest that couples have at least one day a week where they aren’t dominant and submissive they’re Bob and Carol. During this time you sit down and discuss what’s working and what isn’t for each partner. The number one key to making cuckolding work is communication. If one partner resents something the other is doing, you’re in for a big fall. Sounds obvious but it’s easy to get carried away with your roles and just start to assume that the other person is cool with whatever you have in mind.
Lay out ground rules before you start. For some couples the cuckolded male wants to watch his partner get properly fucked. Other couples find that the cuckolded male wants to only listen or hear about the session after it’s over with no participation at all. This just has to do with what senses you use in eroticism. Some people are auditory they want to hear it all but not see it and vice versa. This actually works well to start off with too. Sometimes it’s easier for the newly dominant female to jump on board with the idea of cuckolding if she can choose her fuck toy herself and break the ice by fucking him on her own but telling her partner about it after the fact. Remember, baby steps, don’t rush things and go with whatever makes each person comfortable. Once the ice is broken and she’s more comfortable then she might start bringing her toys home with her for the cuckold to watch.
If during your ‘Bob and Carol’ once a week meetings one person says, ‘I’d rather be there with you when this is going on,’ make sure the other is ready for that. Remember guys, sometimes it’s hard for a woman who’s been newly introduced to cuckolding to get past the fact that you aren’t going to leave her for cheating, or call her a whore during a fight. That’s a BIG no-no. If you decide to go this route, you can NEVER…EVER hold what you do behind closed doors against the other person. The biggest hurdle for a woman to get over is this fear of you doing just that. You can’t have it both ways.
All this being said, I’ve found that most cuckold relationships are actually stronger than their vanilla counterparts. Why? Because there’s no cheating and sneaking around. Everything is above board and both partners are getting what they want. There’s no need to go behind someone’s back.
I love getting to fuck big cocks. I fuck when & how I want. I enjoy humiliating my husband. I put him in chastity & he watches me have the best orgasms of my life. I occasionally let him fuck me, but not too often. I need total control.
Thank you Elizabeth. It’s nice to see a woman’s point-of-view here for a change.
I have known since my husband and I met over 10 years ago that he loved the idea of a big black cock fucking me. It’s his ultimate fantasy. Now in my 30’s I’m much more sexual and want to please my husband more than ever and it actually turns me on to see him so turned on. He has no desire for a threesome or anything like that, he just wants to see a man more endowed than him pleasuring me while he watches. He likes to fuck me right after and feel me all stretched out. We have started with a big black dildo and will see where it takes us but we definitely want to take it slow. I’m still not sure if I can go through with it as I love my husband and really don’t need anyone else to satisfy me. But the fantasy in our bedroom has made out sexlife amazing! This is all fascinating to me.
My wife was aware of my crossdressing when we married; but she does not participate or encourage me in any way. I keep my body and legs smooth shaven; and would love for my wife to encourage; even better; order me to wear sheer nylons on a regular basis for her inspection, seeing as I keep my legs so feminine. She could also tease me about my crossdressing; calling me her feminine, “bitch husband”. Thus; I would enjoy a dominant side to her nature. I’ve also had the fantasy of her being with other men, since before we were married. However; I doubt if she could be open-minded or accepting enough to include them in our marriage. Maybe too little; too late.
Your wife’s reluctance really comes from not understanding her dominant side and how much fun it can be. Why don’t you try to implement simple role plays in your bedroom life. Don’t jump right in to the femme stuff but put her in positions of control and let her feel it out.
I think cuckolding can be complex, it can be about the wife dominating the husband and making your man into a willing cuck is the ultimate form of domination. It can be about the women having an increased sexual desire and wanting attention from other men and making your man a cuck is a safe way to do this. I would be interested in how different women go about making their husband a willing cuckold specially a cuck who participates fully. Looking back I can see how we got into this and how I became a wiling cuckold
Couple of thoughts.
Often, the discussions of cucking are framed in the “extremes”.
Denial of the spouse, humiliation, dominance, etc. For many couples these only serve to drive people away from exploring because it seems too extreme for them. I am skeptical that a married couple can exercise the extremes and be able to sustain a marriage over the long term. For couples who venture into the extremes of cuckolding, I would like to know the data on how many are still be with their partner in 5 years. I recognize that some are, but I would venture than the success rate is very low. The effects of exercising “extremes” can ever be called back, or put back in the proverbial box.
I think, on the other hand, that couples who have the bedrocks of a good relationship: open honest communication, mutual trust, mutual respect- and selflessness, can safely explore beyond the traditional confines of marital monogamy. And the extremes may be for them gradually, in time. Or not. But it is certainly important to not go too fast.
So, here are some thoughts for those starting out. Discuss it not as a ” lifestyle”- in which the successful dynamics and relationship are completely replaced with this new thing. Instead, think of exploring as a choice that you are making together to occasionally enjoy consensual non monogamy, together. Adding to, not replacing.
After each encounter, it will be critical to reconnect physically, and emotionally, within the space of your relationship together. You will NEED to discuss what you enjoyed, and what you didnt like so much.
Make no decisions or conclusions about more or less at that time, but agree to a future (bob and Carol) ” talk date” together- perhaps with a glass of wine and no distractions, removed from the intensity of the moment, to evaluate together if the encounters are accomplishing what they were intended to do: ENHANCE the marriage bed.
And heres where the rubber meets the road.
If one partner does not feel it is enhancing them as a couple, then BOTH must agree to not continue it. We would use this process for other relationship issues. For example, we can safely enjoy a few drinks together or seperately. We can smoke a little weed. We can enjoy a trip to a casino together.
But if one partner is drinking too much, or abusing drugs, or gambling too much and it affects the other in a negative way, it becomes destructive. The same applies to this foray into non monogamy for most couples. Both partners have to agree to give up destructive behavior in favor of the good o the partnership.
THAT wilingness.. to give it up for the other, is the demonstration of commitment to the partner, and the marriage.
For us it was almost an evolving case. We first tried swinging, but since Sven is rather small down there and could not get it up most of the time, it was usually only me who ended up having sex. After a few encounters like that we both realized that he was probably a natural cuckold. I have had sex with six different guys in the last year. All six were larger than my hubby and amazing lovers. I feel really lucky and our relationship has also become much close. So far only positives.
Well done! First of all it’s a pleasure to hear from a woman for a change so thank you for sharing your comments. It’s nice to see a couple who are doing it their way and strengthening the relationship in the process. BRAVO!
That’s your opinion. What is his? If this were true, why would he not share in the post? How do you know if he isn’t harbouring deep pain?
Way to go. Part of the cuckolding experience is a cuck knowing he can’t perform and being outperformed but men who can really satisfy hi wife.
We are in a cuckold relationship and it has only strengthened our bond. Our sex life has become much better and I can get a bigger cock whenever I want without feeling guilty. We both love it but it does require communication.
Cuckolding relationships aren’t stronger. That’s just fantasy. People find that out when the wife wants a divorce or doesn’t allow the husband to have sex with her anymore and goes out with the other guy.
The men that are cucks are perfect for the women/wives that just can’t be in a monogamous relationship.
Isn’t it a BIG no-no for a woman to have sex with another man in the first place? I do agree that it’s a no-no if the man approached his wife with the idea. But if she came up with the idea, then he should have the right to say anything he wants. Remember that cuckolding can take place for different reasons. It could be a case where a man cannot sexually satisfy his wife. It’s one thing for a man to choose to be a cuckold. It’s another for a man to have no choice but to be a cuckold, otherwise his wife leaves him. You should also say “Remember girls, sometimes it’s hard for a man who’s been newly introduced to cuckolding to get past the fact that you aren’t going to leave him for a man that can sexually satisfy you, or call him a loser or inadequate during a fight. That’s a BIG no-no. Remember that the cuckold stands to lose the most in the lifestyle. A man’s (if he still feels like a man) ego is very fragile. He is the only one who is humiliated and demeaned. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. The bull could have an STD, she could leave the husband for the bull, she could lose respect for her husband, he could lose respect for her etc. Furthermore, there are some bulls out there who feel guilty sleeping with another man’s wife. They feel uncomfortable because they try to put themselves in the cuckold’s shoes. Thankfully, the majority of women don’t really know what cuckolding means. Not every woman is comfortable with sleeping around. Especially married women.
A great post and your point about communication is right on the money. I would add that each partner has to know that they have absolute veto power both on a moment to mmoment basis and with regard to the big picture. I think something like a safe word is crucial. Something that says: “Honey. This is too much for me right now.” Additionally each partner has to know that during “Bob and Carol” time she/he can say “No more. I’m done.” Like any other fantasy, cuckolding can feel very different in actual practice than it does when you’re just whispering in each others ears and reality can be too much. Both parties need to be willing to stop if the other partner can’t handle it. Stopping is hard. It may require counseling and even lead to ending the relationship. However, like any other sexual activity, cuckolding must, at the end of the day, be consensual or it’s just cheating.